A Few Hopes for Today’s Teens

Yesterday in chapel, which happened to take place in the gym, with Syd Birrell playing the keyboard and Geoff Bemrose leading us with his guitar, I started the year with the following message:  (this is a shorter version) 

When I ask you, students and staff, what you love most about our school, the answer includes this one word at some point or another – community.

This morning I am going to focus on two aspects of community that require some work. The first is friendships. I personally work hard at my friendships, always have. One of my favourite sayings is that “You cannot make old friends”, and my hope is that some of you will one day come to realize that you have become old friends.

I love good research, and one of the most fascinating research projects comes from Harvard’s research about how people make a good life.  Dr Robert Waldinger, the Director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development and the author of a new book called The Good Life, has been studying the same people through eight decades, consulting with their parents and children.  This is the longest study of what keeps people happy and healthy through life.  Spoiler alert – this research study proves that happiness does not come from fame or money or achievement. Here is the most important finding: good relationships keep us happy and healthy. That’s it.

So in the spirit of asking good questions, here it is – if people could change one thing in their lives to be happier, what does the data say they should choose to do?  People should invest in their relationships with other people.  And this applies to a wide breadth of interactions in our daily lives, from close friends, partners, and teachers, to anyone including staff we interact with in the halls, the dining hall or even the person we run into delivering packages to the front office. We get little hits of wellbeing in all these different kinds of relationships.  

When we have stress which may impact our physical and mental health, we need a deeper connection, like a good friend who can listen to our rant – research shows that that friendship can help alleviate the pressure. I truly believe we only need one friend, with whom we feel comfortable and connected, and we can feel the benefits from that connection.

This morning I remind you of the need to put effort into your friendships. The easiest strategy is to replace screen time with people time.  Or, one of my best friends, Maureen who lives in Halifax, texted me on the weekend with another idea.  She read a wellness article in the New York Times called the 7-Day Happiness Challenge and Day Two is about an eight minute phone call. So Sunday night, as Kevin and I drove home from Kawartha Nordic where we had an awesome afternoon ski, we got on the phone with Maureen, and although we could talk for hours, we agreed to eight minutes. When we hung up, I was so happy to have had this connection. Apparently, a study of 240 adults in 2021 found that when participants received brief phone calls a few times a week, their levels of depression, loneliness and anxiety were rapidly reduced compared with people who didn’t receive a call.  So my first message is to connect with your friends – make a call.

Second, I want to address one of the nuances of learning and living in community. 

When I was a kid, my brothers and I fought. One time, after he had been bugging me and bugging me, I leaned over and kicked him in the gut. It is actually the only time I have done something like that, so it sticks out for me.  (And apparently it stood out for him as well, as he told that story at my wedding as a warning to Kevin that ‘She’s nice but she can kick’). Anyway, I see that kick in a similar way to today’s cancel culture.  When we call-out behaviour, we react harshly; we cancel others; we don’t invite them into solving problems.  Sometimes it’s because the issues are small, or subtle, or sneaky, or trying to be funny, or maybe unintentional…but the impact, not the intention, is what is important.  

Harvard’s centre for Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging has a Guide to calling-in and calling-out behaviour.  As we foster spaces of belonging, we must recognize, name, and address when individuals or groups with marginalized identities are experiencing harm, such as bias or discrimination. The concepts of “calling-out” or “calling-in” have become helpful ways of thinking about how to bring attention to this type of harm. 

To be clear – I expect you to deal differently with serious instances of disrespect, in which case you should turn to adults for support.  I know you know we have a process in our School Life Guide for dealing with respect, consent, bullying and harrassment. I am talking now about the micro-aggressions.  Knowing the difference between these concepts can help us reflect, and then act, in ways we feel will best promote constructive change.

So as we start 2023, and as we come near to the end of a global pandemic and with rising extremism, I have a few hopes for you.

We have made a commitment as a school to be global – this year we have 44 countries represented. And we have made a commitment to celebrate diversity and be inclusive, in our houses, classes, values, and in our day-to-day lives. And it turns out that being inclusive also requires daily practice.  My hope is that we actively understand instances of microaggressions, and the difference between intent and impact, and the difference between calling-out behaviour and calling-in conversations.

My hope this year is that you reflect on when it’s important and effective to call someone in, and when we do, we acknowledge we all make mistakes. We also help someone discover why their behavior, even if it was unintentional, is harmful, and how to change it. And we do call-in with compassion and patience. 

I saw a quotation that said this – we tend to judge others by their behaviour, and ourselves by our intentions.  My hope is that we presume good intentions.

In an increasingly diverse world, I hope we always focus on how we will negotiate our relationships.  Of course I am proud of Lakefield College School.  Here, you are learning to be with others in your houses and your advisor groups; you are surrounded by amazing adults on campus who invest time in navigating social interactions.  Here, you are learning to listen in Harkness discussions, and learning to disagree, respectfully. Here, you are also learning one of the hardest lessons – be it in business, in leadership, and in life – and that is to seek points of agreement.

My hope is that we are a community who practices “calling-in” with kindness and curiosity, so we can maintain an emotionally safe community.  The feeling of inclusion and belonging of everyone is important at The Grove.  

So please, may we invest in our community by 

1. Making a call and 2. Calling-in.  

And remember – the good life is built with good relationships.

What is Lakefield College School really like?

After two long years of safety protocols and zoom meetings, I took advantage of a warm Friday afternoon and wandered out of my office. Our Leadership Team agreed that this would be a year of consolidation and connectivity, and we all made a promise to get off of our laptops and be more present. 

So here is what happens at Lakefield College School on a Friday evening. I wasn’t sure if I would watch some pick up soccer or basketball, or if I would head down to the waterfront to catch a game of volleyball or a rambunctious game of spike ball, or if I would just see who is hanging out in the lake or on the dock.  There are usually multiple speakers around campus with different kinds of music playing here and there.  Seeing – and hearing! – our teens outside enjoying time together before dinner always makes me smile.

But last Friday, I experienced a first – Addy Ross called me over to where her family was gathered on Muskoka chairs by the soccer field. If you ever need a pick-me-up, get to know Addy Ross.  At just three years old, she has her finger on the pulse of our campus, notices everything, and calls out everyone by name.   Seeing her screaming my name while waving her arms for me to come over filled me with joy.  She made my whole being smile.  Turns out, Addy was particularly excited because her Dad, Adam Ross, our Athletics Director, bought Moose Tracks ice cream – plus sugar cones! – to celebrate the first week of school and she invited me to join them.

As I sat eating ice cream with the Ross family children playing all around us, Heather Ross, one of our Outdoor Education Teachers, commented on the students on the soccer field. These were mostly our new students who had arrived the day before, and yet she was calling them out by name, and I was totally impressed.  How, after only one day, did she already know our students’ names?  Her eyes lit up as she explained her secret – the best way to learn new student names was to be in charge of the swim test.  She had spent the day at the lake and met every one of them as they were tested.  So, over the course of the hour, as we sat watching the sun set and the little ones getting out their evening energy, Heather and Adam pointed out various students playing soccer, noting where they were from, which House they were in, and who had siblings that I might know.  Their passion for knowing our students was genuine and quite inspirational.

Then Adam stood up, scooped Addy under his arm, and announced that he had to run to town for a few minutes so he could go to a meeting at the Curling Club in Lakefield.  He was hoping they would welcome our students to play. Remember – this is Friday night, and he was squeezing in time to create this opportunity for our students.  Again, I was moved by his generous spirit, his focus on partnerships with our local community and his initiative to ensure our students would have more options to be active this winter.

So that’s a glimpse into life at Lakefield College School. Families live on campus. Teens are outdoors in the evenings, playing with each other with no phones in sight.  Teachers go above and beyond to know students and create opportunities so they can experience more.  And a 53 year old Head of School gets to hang out with a three year old girl, marvel in her joyful approach to life, and see her ability to create a feeling of belonging.

More relevant than ever

In a moment of social media weakness, I clicked on an article called “25 Brands That Are Dying Out” and I started to worry.  As I scrolled through brands of my childhood, like Jello, Campbell’s Soup, and Chef Boyardee, and then those of my young adult life like Gap, Crocs and Kodak, I felt a range of emotions.  I suppose none of the struggling brands really surprised me and it is probably a good thing that society has become more health and environmentally conscious.  And yet, I found myself wondering about the simple fact that people lose interest in things and consumer trends change.  Naturally, my mind wandered to the organization where I work and live  – could my school ever become a story of the past?

I wish the answer was a simple no.  The fact is, we all need to continually ask ourselves this question and never rest on our laurels.  The strongest schools are the ones that work hard to stay relevant, holding on to the best of the past while striving to meet the changing needs of families.  

For over 140 years, parents have been choosing to send their children to Lakefield College School, and eight years ago, I also chose this school for my son (who is now in his final year at McGill) and daughter (who is in her third year at IE in Madrid).  I chose Lakefield because of the strength of its programs – its mission is to “challenge and enable students to reach their individual potential in mind, body and spirit” and I wanted that kind of well-rounded, enriching environment for my kids.  There are a lot of opportunities, including a wide-range of courses and an unbelievable list of co-curricular programs.  I also knew from my research and work as the Executive Director of CAIS for over 11 years, that the teachers were world-class with a genuine passion for learning through relationships.  Now that I am Head of School here, I believe that our school is more relevant than ever for another important reason:  we have the courage and humility to acknowledge and address areas to improve.  Let me point out three areas in particular: 

We are committed to being even more affordable

Lakefield College School strives to be accessible to a wide variety of families. We are grateful that our alumni and parents continue to choose to donate back to our school so that approximately one third of our student body receives financial support annually.  I believe that parents should ask about the size of a school’s endowment, as this is a real indicator of the values as well as the strength and permanence of a school.  Find out more about how to afford our school here.

We are working hard to be even more inclusive

With 270 teenagers living in our 12 houses on campus, and another 130 teens joining us each day, we prioritize safety.  We invest in staff development, a high student to staff ratio, and small advisor groups.  What I hear from our families is that our students are known and supported.  And we have made a commitment to be even more inclusive.  As one example, we acknowledged in our strategic planning process that we have a facilities gap, so we are upgrading our residences to be more inclusive.  When our two new houses open this fall, we will have one of Canada’s first inclusive housing models, including stalled washrooms.

We are building on our strength to become an environmental leader

LCS has always been an outdoors school, now situated on 300+ acres, with two campuses.  100% of our students are required to take a course in outdoor education, ensuring that they experience both the beauty and challenge of nature. For over a century, our students have been learning skills such as how to paddle a canoe, build a campfire in the rain, and collaborate on an Algonquin expedition. Last spring, we introduced a farm program at our Northcote Campus, and students are learning how to grow food that is produced for our campus and local charitable partners: 40-45% is intentionally grown to be donated to Nourish Project, Kawartha Food Share, and the Lakefield Community Food Bank. We are excited to see how we can continue to inspire teens to be leaders with a deep connection with and responsibility to the environment and their communities. Obviously, I love this school.  I see engaged teenagers; I see our staff striving 24/7 to make the student experience the best it can be.  Our community gives me a deep sense of gratitude, and we share a passion to get even better.  One of my alumni mentors recently told me that if you aren’t at least slightly paranoid, you should ask more questions.  I agree!  In my monthly parent meetings, we ask for feedback.  It’s also my practice to engage every student at least twice per year in two questions:  what is working well and what can we do to improve?  The fact is, we are all passionate about improvement around here (See articles from this week alone!  on learning, on running, and on community.)  As a community we strive to ask good questions, be kind, and try our best.  For these reasons, I agree with Rory Gilfillan whose words inspired this video:  the world needs Lakefield now, more than ever.

Welcome to our new CAIS Heads

We are very excited to introduce you to the newest members of CAIS:

And welcome back to our colleagues:

We are thrilled to have such incredible leaders in our independent schools, and we wish them a warm welcome to our learning community.

Happy September everyone!

Is financial sustainability still the number one challenge facing independent schools?

Every three years, we ask our CAIS Heads and Chairs to identify their top three challenges, and we use this data to inform our research and professional development programs. So in 2013, when the top challenge was financial sustainability, we made that our focus (Think 2051 Project!). When you are in the business of whole school continuous improvement, you better know what is top of mind for members.

So this is the year to ask again, and I predict the following – the number one challenge will not be financial sustainability.

Merriam-Webster defines sustainability as “able to be used without being completely used up or destroyed.” Good news! I have read every accreditation report over the past ten years, and more significantly, I have read every Response Report that demonstrates a school’s commitment to implementing the recommendations. This qualifies me to tell you that CAIS schools are not anywhere near “being used up;” in fact, they are working hard to ensure the opposite.

But for anyone thinking that this is a feel-good blog about the future of CAIS schools … “Not so fast Lopez!” There are significant questions in the current educational landscape:

  • Assessment for learning – How do we ensure it is dynamic, embedded and formative, based on real time data and enabled by technology?
  • Blended learning – How do we lead in terms of real-time, data-driven instruction and open up multiple pathways for students to learn and parents, students and teachers to communicate?
  • Competency-base learning – How can we develop a broader conceptualization of evidence of student mastery? And can we figure out a way to get universities to honour this in the application process?
  • Personalized learning – How do we move toward personalization for each student’s unique needs, interests, passions and competency-based pathways, while honouring the provincial curriculum requirements?
  • Project-Based Learning (PBL) – How can we do more student exhibitions that are authentic demonstrations of learning and connected to our communities, without simply making them an add-on for students?
  • Work-based learning – How can our university preparatory schools include co-op opportunities? Can they also be global, and entrepreneurial? Can we develop a badge system that is meaningful and rigorous?
  • Adult-development learning – This is new; in fact, I just made it up. But I am reading How to Raise and Adult and I believe that the author has hit on one of the key challenges facing our schools in particular: how do we raise happy students who know and like themselves? How do we encourage parents to back off and do the same?

Given these challenges, no school can rest on its laurels and not worry about its future strength. So for CAIS schools, I propose two new years’ resolutions:

  1. Change our terminology from “sustainability” to “permanence and strength” and focus on ongoing research to answer the above questions.
  1. Collaborate in terms of research but also in terms of PD. Never before has it been more important to figure out these challenges, and I am a firm believer in the power of together. (If you are a CAIS leader, you should meet your colleagues in Vancouver in April to have some catalytic conversations about the future of education. Read more and register here.)

p.s. I like this list of post-secondary trends.

Four Secrets Parents Should Know About Private Schools

It happened twice this week. At the bank, I was asked about CAIS and the manager expressed shock about one of the differences between CAIS schools and other private schools. And then in an article in the Toronto Star, I read about the call for private schools to be more regulated. Again, I was reminded that the general public does not realize that there are some real myths about private schools that need to be clarified. So it got me thinking – what are the biggest secrets about private schools? At the moment, I can think of four.

Secret #1 – CAIS schools are not for profit

I think people make an assumption about this one. Maybe it is because the school facilities are incredibly beautiful or maybe it is because some of the alumni become famous or maybe it is because the students are perceived to be from wealthy families. But the fact is, our schools are run as Not for Profits and therefore have governing boards who work incredibly hard to ensure that all of the tuition money goes back to benefit the schools. As an accrediting organization, CAIS is willing to accredit a share capital school, but currently there are no for profit schools in Canada that are CAIS accredited. Parents should know the difference.

Secret #2 – All private schools are not equal

This one drives me nuts. Parents must do their homework on schools to fully understand that private schools should be defined by more than their academic and co-curricular programs. For starters, families should spend time at the school to determine the culture and get to know the students and staff. I believe that culture is everything (and you can register for a Faculty Culture module at our CAIS Summer Leadership Institute here.) But here’s the thing – parents must realize that it is the leadership and finances that define the long-term strength of a school. So how do you find this out? I am biased, but there is only one way for parents to determine the best schools in Canada – verify if the school is CAIS accredited by researching the list of accredited schools in Canada here.

Secret #3 – CAIS students outperform others at university

I hope this is the assumption of most, but no one other than CAIS has the actual data that tracks university success. CAIS did an eight year study that tracked CAIS students in university and the results from over 60,000 marks should be known by everyone searching for a school. From our research, we learned the following: CAIS students consistently receive A and B grades in almost three quarters of the courses they take (73%), and CAIS students outperform the class averages in their university courses (where this data is available) in every subject area. What I like best about CAIS schools is this – they complete this research so that they can improve their programs, not so that they can market the findings. The humility of CAIS schools is remarkable.

Secret #4 – CAIS schools are more affordable than you think

This is one of the boarding school myths that we “busted,” but this secret applies to all CAIS schools because CAIS schools offer generous amounts of financial assistance to families across Canada every year. Parents should research the bursaries and scholarships available in CAIS schools here, and they should not be shy about asking about the process. For example, in 2013-2014, 6411 students attending 84 of our CAIS schools received financial aid totaling $59.3 million. That’s quite the secret.

I know that the CAIS community knows this stuff. I just wish everyone else did too.

The Power of Accreditation

There’s often debate in the world of accreditation about which is more valuable – the preparation of the Internal Evaluation Report or the review by the Visiting Committee. I like to think this way – both are important, much the same way that you clean your house, but you clean it better when company is coming. (And when they come for the weekend? You clean your closets too!)

But both are only important if there are two key ingredients – good people engaged in good conversations.

Now we like to say that CAIS is in the business of asking good questions – be it for research, PD or accreditation. So our mission of whole school improvement is best achieved when we ask good questions both at the internal and on-site stages of the process. We have launched our new Accreditation Guidelines, and although there are fewer questions, we believe they are the better ones for schools with a true passion for learning in all areas of program and operations. Our schools are so busy, that this process forces everyone to stop and think about what is done well and what can be improved.

Last week at West Point Grey Academy, Sarah Fast lead the Internal Evaluation review that included a thoroughly reflective process that left no stone unturned. Before the team even arrived, she reported that the process was highly valuable. (I have two words for that – Of course!)

The second value occurs during the visit. Val Pighin, our Accreditation Coordinator, works incredibly hard to find the best Visiting Committee members, and by best we mean people from similar schools who have the expertise and experience to really challenge the school by asking great questions. In the case of the visit to WPGA, the group was stellar. The Head of school, Tam Matthews, wrote this: “School, Board and especially the teachers were/are very positive on CAIS Accred.” That unsolicited feedback is proof positive about the benefits of a team from across Canada spending four days at the school engaged in great conversations.

But then this week, I was moved again by the email from the Chair of the Visiting Committee that sparked a series of additional reflections. Rodger Wright wrote:

“It was an honour and a delight to be in your orbit over the last few days and I can’t thank you enough for parking your own lives, taking this job so seriously, and doing it so conscientiously.  I hope we added a little value to an awesome school and came away with the odd gem to apply to our awesome schools. I learned a lot from you guys and I’m so happy our paths crossed at WPGA.”

So I smile thinking about this image of goodness spreading across Canada. Crazy but true! For not only does West Point Grey Academy benefit, but when the Visiting Committee members return to their schools, tired but full of energy and ideas, they can apply their learning to their schools.

That kind of national impact on schools is what I call powerful.

Welcome to the New CAIS Heads – 2015

We all talk about the need for great leaders to run our great schools, and there’s so much excitement around finding the next leader.

Take a look at the bios, photos, and letters of welcome below, and you will realize that CAIS continues to be in good hands:

This is an extraordinary list of leaders. A few thoughts –

  • Four are experienced Heads (Two of whom returned to schools from retirement!)
  • Three are from outside of Canada
  • Three held senior leadership positions in CAIS schools and were mentored there (Thanks to Rory Paul, Michael Fellin, and Martha Perry)
  • Two have participated in our CAIS Leadership Institute (and will speak at our Summer LI at St. Andrew’s!)
  • One is a former Director of Admissions

Congratulations to all of our CAIS schools for recruiting this caliber of talent.

Looking forward to meeting in person in Halifax at our Heads and Chairs Conference.

And most importantly – all the best for an amazing year.

The extraordinary commitment of CAIS leaders

So there I stood at St. Margaret’s School, on the pathway between the dining room and the junior school building. I was happy to chat with people as they walked past me. This was day three of our CAIS Summer LI and people seemed settled in and comfortable. I had toured all of the LI module classes that day, and the engagement was high. The entire campus was buzzing with discussions of faculty culture, governance, leadership, accreditation, and brain research. As I walked around, I got this feeling that everyone had known each other for years and were working toward a common purpose with energy.

On that pathway at that moment, I had this proud feeling that I had had a few other times since arriving in Victoria – isn’t it amazing that over 150 CAIS leaders are here during their summer holidays?

And that’s when it hit me – it was almost 7:00pm on a Saturday night.

There it is. There’s the difference between CAIS schools and other schools. At that moment, over 150 CAIS leaders were actually going to learn from 7:00 – 9:00pm. And yet no one complained. Not a one.

Our Leadership Institute is one of my favourite events every year. I actually feel overwhelmed when I think that all of the participants could be wrapping up their year at school or getting some of that organizational and reflective work done. Better yet, they could be doing what the thousands of teachers across Canada are doing in early July – vacationing!

So when I think about the many great memories from this year’s Summer LI, and I think about the outstanding programs, including The 2051 Project, I want to hold on to this one image of people walking to class on the Saturday night. I cannot remember who it was that I stopped, but I asked, “Is there any place you’d rather be – in the entire world – other than right here, right now?”

The response?

“Absolutely no where!”

Makes me proud to be associated with such incredible professionals who are committed, passionate, caring, learners who go hard at improving their capacity for our students, even on a Saturday night in July.

p.s. Thanks to Cathy Thornicroft and the St Margaret’s team for being such gracious hosts.

p.p.s. Check out www.cais.ca for the slideshow, speech videos, and 2051 resources.

What are the hottest trends in education? And how do we address them?

My job is to watch trends, and so when I had the chance to meet with other Executive Directors this week in Fort Worth, and the conversation inevitably turned to the changing landscape, I was in my element.

Here are the three trends (with a shout out to my mentors, who advise three bullets, and three bullets only):

What should children learn?

  • How can schools best develop character? We know from our Parent Motivation survey that development of character, morals and values is today’s parents’ priority. I follow NYT’s journalist David Brooks and recommend his most recent book, The Road to Character.
  • How can schools best develop entrepreneurs? This article on raising kids to be billionaires is actually not all evil and manages well the dilemma of focusing on opportunity and money and yet also generosity and values.

How should children learn?

  • How will blended learning change our schools? While some are arguing that this is not a trend (See a recent article here), others are arguing that this is the disruptive innovation on our industry.
  • What does personalized learning, the trend that everyone agrees is the number one trend, actually look like? Bob Snowden has done a great job exploring this question in a series in his blog.

There may be others, but for now, I would say that these are the hottest trends in learning. I believe we always need to pay attention to trends, and the latest figures on the decline of school age children in Canada is a real wake-up call that we need to sharpen the saw. (The forecasted total decrease in School Aged Children from 2010 – 2025 is 771,287, which is a 20.7% total decrease).

What can our CAIS schools learn from other schools?

  • What can we learn from for-profit schools? Here is one example of a for-profit school expanding its international clientele.
  • What is going on in Asia and what will be the impact on our CAIS independent schools? CAIS wrote an Asian Trends Report last year, and we continue to follow activity.
  • How can we learn from start-ups? This week, Elon Musk announced that he will start a school. With all due respect, what does he know about education, and why are parents willing to trust a school with no history? But with all due respect, what can our traditional and successful schools learn from this parent, who was obviously dissatisfied with the local public and private options?

The second question – how do we address these trends – is more of a challenge. It requires research – such as our 2051 Project – that captures the complexity of the trends, or as we call it, the “dual challenge”. But more importantly, it requires the best minds working collaboratively.

This week, I am meeting with the leaders of our CAIS National Networks. Those of you who know me know I am super cheap. So you may be surprised to know that CAIS is actually paying for everyone to travel to meet in person. But I firmly believe that the future strength and permanence of our schools will require much more collaboration. It will require time, in meetings and in less formal situations, to learn and debate and problem-solve. Our new national conference model is based on this same philosophy of diverse thinkers engaging in catalytic conversations about the future of education. I know I will be in my element again when that happens, so I can’t wait to get started.